WATERTOWN, MA—Sources can now confirm that there is still nothing new to report on the search for Boston Marathon bombing suspect Dzhokar A. Tsarnaev. Those with knowledge of the situation are currently telling reporters that nothing has changed and there are no new developments. Reports have confirmed, however, that instead of saying one brother has died and the other is on the run, sources will instead switch that information around to make it sound different than previous reports, thus making it seem like new information is being added. Sources are now saying that one brother is on the run and the other has been shot and killed.
BREAKING: Still Nothing
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