An article in last week's edition of The Onion entitled "What To Do With All Those Fresh Cherries" neglected to mention putting one over each eye and making your friends call you Little Miss Mary Maraschino for a week. The Onion apologizes for the omission.
The Onion apologizes for leaving the drawbridge down overnight.
Last Wednesday, The Onion used the word “jaunt” well over 10 times in the article “Suspect Jaunts Off With Stolen Cash.” The Onion regrets leaning ...
Last Tuesday’s edition of The Onion was actually the October 1990 issue of Sports Illustrated For Kids.