Congress' Pre-Christmas Cuts

American Voices • The Onion's Guide To The Holidays • holidays • ISSUE 41•51 • Dec 22, 2005

The House recently voted to cut $1.6 billion in social-program spending right before Christmas. What do you think?

“Well, isn't this in keeping with the true spirit of Congress?”
Babette Layton –
Police Officer
“Christmas is a time for fellowship and good will towards men, not a lot of negativity about who is or isn't able to afford food or heat.”
Nick Cardy –
Web Press Operator
“Geez, you people are never happy. If the House voted to cut $1.6 billion in social programs in the late spring, you would say they were ruining people's summer.”
Mike Royer –
Furniture Restoration Expert

More American Voices

Apple Dodged Billions In Taxes

Apple CEO Tim Cook was questioned by lawmakers today, following a congressional report that showed how the company used a complex web of offshore subsidiaries ...

American Consumers Happiest Since 2007

Americans’ confidence in the U.S. economy reached its highest level since July 2007, according to the latest reading of a leading consumer sentiment index.

Yahoo Buying Tumblr For $1.1 Billion

As part of CEO Marissa Mayer’s strategy to expand the company’s social and mobile presence and attract younger users, Yahoo will purchase the ...