ARLINGTON, TX–According to adjacent-cubicle sources, Midwest Insurance employee Benjamin Vance checks his e-mail every two minutes. "That little 'ping' noise is driving me up the friggin' wall," co-worker Irene Snow said. "It's like this sick obsession with him. Does he have nothing else to do but check e-mail all day long? It's not like he ever gets any, either. He just has to constantly check." Added Snow: "Jesus."