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    'Diamond Joe' Biden Takes Over Onion Politics Twitter Feed During Vice Presidential Debate

    Twitter Update • Politics • politicians • joseph biden • ISSUE 48•41 • Oct 12, 2012
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    'Diamond Joe' Biden Takes Over Onion Politics Twitter Feed During Vice Presidential Debate
    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Have some debate bullshit I got to do tonight.

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Why doesn't the backstage bathroom have a plunger? It's not going to be Uncle Joe's fault if the toilet can't handle what he's giving.

    11 Oct 12
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    @ TheOnion

    Biden Puts On Lucky Debate Suit onion.com/RjGHeI

    Retweeted by @ OnionPolitics 11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Leather jacket lookin good, but think these tight leather pants are giving me serious nut rash # debates

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Lovin it here in Danville. Picked up some unreal bud earlier # debateprep

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Filled water bottle I found backstage with vodka # debates

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Is that guy's first name Paul or Ryan? # spaced

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    These spotlights are brutal. Too bad I left Gladys at home. That boa would’ve loved basking in the heat. # debates

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    I'm giggling because I'm fucking blazed # debates

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Hey @ BarackObama , that’s how you make a fucking point # debates

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Couple drops of Visine and nobody will ever know # debates

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Paul Ryan's just totally wonking-off all over my face # debates

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Just spraying his hot wonk everywhere # debates

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Time for a quick story about that Wisconsin woman named Janna Ryan who never experienced an orgasm # debates

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    I've had a roll in the hay with Paul Ryan's mom. She's gorgeous, and she's healthy as an ox # debates

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Apropos of nothing, ejaculating in a hot tub feels amazing. Anyway, back to the debate.

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    They call this guy a budget wonk? I've got more fiscal responsibility in my left nut.

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    The wonk is just splooging out of him # debates

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Whoa, not feeling great. # debates

    11 Oct 12
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    Biden Unleashes Torrent Of Vomit On Debate Stage onion.com/SV1SZT

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Feeling better now # pukedaton

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Took most of the debate, but check out what I just carved into the table with my jackknife ow.ly/i/112Sq

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Martha’s been eye fucking me all night. Gonna be tough keeping my stick in neutral while I’m speaking # debates

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Definitely gotta keep Planned Parenthood. Can’t tell you how many times they’ve bailed me out over the years # debates

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    A woman should have the right to say what part of her body she wants me to give the ol' tip of the tongue. # MyPersonalWomensHealthPlan

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Wonder if Paul wants to go on cooze patrol # VeepSnakes # Bipartisanship

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Think anyone will notice if I leak the lizard under this table? Shouldn’t have had so many Genny Lights # debates

    11 Oct 12
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    The Onion
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    @ TheOnion

    Eloquent Biden Brings Entire Audience To Tears In Debate Stunner onion.com/SV5smL

    Retweeted by @ OnionPolitics 11 Oct 12
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    Biden Shares 20-Minute Post-Debate Kiss With Janna Ryan onion.com/SV60cj

    Retweeted by @ OnionPolitics 11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    So what’s the deal, any shit happening off-campus after this thing? # debates

    11 Oct 12
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    Diamond Joe @ OnionPolitics

    Debate after party @ lexingtonrhino . You can touch the strippers if you've got enough coin.

    11 Oct 12
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