New York, NY—In a dramatic turn for the 2012 presidential race, comatose former congressman John Clarkson threw his hat into the ring for the ...

Early Polls Indicate 44% of Respondents Saying "It's about damn time" and 32% Wishing For A Kick Instead of Punch NEW YORK, NY (October ...

Onion News Network To Broadcast Planet's Final Moments NEW YORK, NY (September 29, 2011) - With a giant asteroid expected to hit Earth on October ...