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    Drugs In America

    Slideshow • Politics • drugs • ISSUE 45•21 • Jun 2, 2009
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    • 'Tony's Law' Would Require Marijuana Users To Inform Interested Neighbors

      WASHINGTON, DC—Citizens spoke before Congress Monday in support of Tony's Law, a Senate measure that would require all marijuana-law offenders to inform their neighbors if they're holding.
      1 of 10
    • Area Stoner Convinced Everyone On TV Also Stoned

      ATHENS, GA—In a highly stoned statement made while sitting around watching late-night cable TV with his roommates Tuesday, Athens-area stoner Dirk Udell announced his conviction that everyone on TV is also stoned.
      2 of 10
    • Meth Addicts Demand Government Address Nation's Growing Spider Menace

      WASHINGTON, DC—Activists called for federal assistance as a last resort after trying to contain the problem with diplomacy, cathode rays, and methamphetamines.
      3 of 10
    • Huge Quantities Of Primo Shit Incinerated By Feds

      LAKE ARROWHEAD, CA—A ton of people up and down the coast were seriously bumming Monday, when the Drug Enforcement Administration announced the seizure and destruction of huge quantities of seriously primo shit.
      4 of 10
    • Stoner Regales Friends With Tale Of This One Bong He Saw In Iowa City Once

      MINNEAPOLIS—Area stoner Mike Cudahy, his eyes a deep red from five years of near-continuous recreational marijuana use, regaled friends and neighbors Tuesday with half-remembered tales of this one amazing bong he saw in Iowa City once.
      5 of 10
    • Report: Your Favorite Player Took Steroids

      NEW YORK—Representatives from Major League Baseball, the National Football League, the National Basketball Association, the National Hockey League, and several other major sporting organizations announced Tuesday that a study conducted...
      6 of 10
    • Drug Paraphernalia Visible In Photo Of Missing Cat

      7 of 10
    • Stoner Architect Drafts All-Foyer Mansion

      MINNEAPOLIS–In the oft-overlooked field of stoner architecture, new talent often goes unnoticed. But that hasn't been the case for Minneapolis stoner architect Richard "Dick" Donovan, whose groundbreaking design for an all-foyer mansion is earning slack-jawed admiration from some of the most respected members of the Twin Cities stoner-architecture community.
      8 of 10
    • Everyone Involved In Pizza's Preparation, Delivery, Purchase Extremely High

      AUSTIN, TX–Everyone involved in the preparation, delivery, purchase and consumption of a pizza from Tony's New York-Style Pizzeria was thoroughly baked off his ass, it was reported Monday.
      9 of 10
    • DEA Chief: Winners Occasionally Use Drugs

      WASHINGTON, DC—In a surprise announcement with wide-ranging implications for U.S. narcotics policy, Drug Enforcement Administration director Thomas Constantine acknowledged Monday that some winners
      10 of 10
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