CLEVELAND—Tracy Anderton is making a tremendous mistake by thinking she can find happiness with a successful trial lawyer, ex-boyfriend Jack Colgrave reported Tuesday. "Since we broke up, Tracy has exhibited some really self-destructive behavior, from losing a dramatic amount of weight, to discarding several old photo albums, to now becoming involved with people who are clearly wrong for her," Colgrave said. "If this doesn't stop soon, I worry she'll end up doing something really drastic—like moving in with this new guy, or worse, not answering any more of my telephone calls." As of press time, Anderton has continued to ignore pleas to stop and think for a second, look at what she's doing for Christ's sake, and not throw everything away because of some stupid other woman.
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