News in Brief

Expiration Of Contract Allows Fergie To Put On Pair Of Pants For First Time In 5 Years

September 28, 2011 | ISSUE 47•39

BRENTWOOD, CA—Black Eyed Peas vocalist Stacy "Fergie" Ferguson told reporters Wednesday her contract with the group has expired, legally allowing her to wear pants for the first time since 2006. "Ahhhh," said Fergie, pulling on a pair of tan slacks. "Pants." The singing sensation added that while her agreement is being renegotiated, she will enjoy not having to contact Will.i.am every four hours, not referring to her breasts as her "lady lumps," and remaining silent on the highly drivable qualities of the new Honda Civic.

The Onion

[x] Click to close

© Copyright 2012, Onion, Inc. All rights reserved.