• Windows XP operating system
  • Will offer new titles in such popular Xbox series as Ace Combat, Kane & Lynch, Crash
  • Time, and Call of Juarez
  • Xbox Hat—Say the words “Xbox Hat” out loud and a large image of a hat will appear on your TV screen
  • 92-Core x500 P2W (G4-Jig system), 2F3 DLX silver frame technology, 2/5/5/MP2s zoomnet capability, Zip control (TV/satellite/laptop), 3.1.8 optical input-output, 34V-876-ZZB, custom 2x cross-memory feedback, DVD
  • Ability to capture live game play, edit it, and send it to your pathetic friends
  • 500 GB of added system memory you can buy separately for more fucking money
  • Color green probably in there somewhere
  • Kinect motion sensor capable of responding to what you consider movement
  • Preloaded with episodes of Get Smart
  • Gumball dispenser