DETROIT—-Ford officials issued a massive recall of the entire 2010 Mustang line Tuesday, apologizing for a quality-control oversight that led to the company manufacturing a badass muscle car that was way too awesome for the American public. "We deeply regret this lapse in judgment and accept full responsibility for the mistake," Ford CEO Alan R. Mulally said standing beside a gorgeous, cherry-red vehicle recalled for being "way too smoking." "After numerous road tests, we've found the car to be a mean, mean ride that Americans are simply not cool enough to handle, and it would be irresponsible of us to allow anyone to get behind the wheel of this killer car. It's truly frightening how sweet the Mustang is." According to Mulally, Ford has canceled production on the 2011 Mustang, and will instead release a line of fuel-efficient vehicles in an effort to appeal to boring old Americans.
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