Next week, Paramount Pictures is releasing a newly retooled Friday The 13th, produced by Michael Bay and directed by Marcus Nispel, who directed the remake of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. What has been changed in this version?
For the first time, we actually learn what month the story takes place in
Jason now wearing football helmet in addition to hockey mask
Drawn-out, winking cameo appearance by someone who must have been in the first one
Jason's illiterate grunting now corrected with Auto-Tune
Jason is 29 years older, 40 pounds heavier, and just coming out of a nasty divorce
Small role found for one of Hulk Hogan's kids.
Camp counselors waiting until marriage
It's four and a half hours long and it sucks