Last week The Onion referred to the Full Moon Killer as the Corpse-Making Killer. The Onion was unaware that everyone was already calling him the Full Moon Killer. The Onion regrets the error.
The Onion apologizes for its failure to meet the oh-so-high editorial standards of a genius such as yourself.
The headline of Tuesday's article about homegrown terrorism was not as alarmist as it could have been.
After defending Cindy for years, The Onion finally realized she’s no good. You were right.