Earth reclaiming Haiti today
    • Facebook
    • Twitter
    • Follow @TheOnion
Show/Hide Navigation
  • Video
  • Politics
  • Sports
  • Business
  • Science/Tech
  • Entertainment
  • Breaking
  • More
    • Video
    • Politics
    • Sports
    • Business
    • Science/Tech
    • Entertainment
    • Breaking

    Greed In America

    Slideshow • Economy • money • business • ISSUE 45•39 • Sep 29, 2009
    • Facebook69
    • Twitter0
    • Google Plus0
    • $700 Billion Bailout Celebrated With Lavish $800 Billion Executive Party

      GEORGE TOWN, CAYMAN ISLANDS—4-tons of Beluga caviar and $250,000 bottles of vintage Dom Pérignon were on hand for America's CEOs to celebrate the historic bailout.
      1 of 10
    • Federal Judge Rules Parker Brothers Holds Monopoly Monopoly

      WASHINGTON, DC–In a landmark antitrust decision, U.S. District Judge Thomas Nance ruled Monday that Parker Brothers' controlling interest in the popular board game Monopoly constitutes an illegal Monopoly monopoly.
      2 of 10
    • KFC Releases New Family-Size Nugget

      3 of 10
    • Exxon Paleontologists Call For Increased U.S. Fossil Production

      IRVING, TX—In what Exxon officials described as
      4 of 10
    • Product Placement Mars Otherwise Exciting Super Bowl

      JACKSONVILLE, FL—Although NFL commissioner Paul Tagliabue declared the Super Bowl XXXIX experiment with in-game product placement a success, fans and players expressed mixed feelings about the championship game Monday.
      5 of 10
    • Just Six Corporations Remain

      NEW YORK—At the current rate of mergers, there will be only one corporation in the world by the year 2000.
      6 of 10
    • Congress Raises Executive Minimum Wage To $565.15/Hr

      WASHINGTON, DC—Congress approved a bill to increase the executive minimum wage from $515.15 to $565.15 an hour, House Majority Leader Tom DeLay (R-TX) announced Monday. The move marks the first increase in the wage since 1997.
      7 of 10
    • In The Know: Are America's Rich Falling Behind The Super-Rich?

      Panelists discuss a new study showing the gap between the wealthy and the absurdly wealthy is widening, and how we can help the merely rich catch up.
      8 of 10
    • McDonald's Employee Just In It For The Money

      SHREVEPORT, LA—Sean Boyce, 22, cares more about getting his paycheck than dedicating himself to his craft.
      9 of 10
    • 2008 Tax Records Reveal Sasha Obama Made $136 In Allowance Money

      WASHINGTON—The first daughter tried to dodge senators' questions by playing with her pigtails, leaving to use the bathroom, and asking what
      10 of 10
    • More Slideshows

      Start Over
      • The Week In Review

      • Crime & Crime Fighters

      • The Week In Review

      • Back To School

      • The Week in Review

    Recently in Slideshow See More >

    Entertainment

    Lifestyle

    News

    Lifestyle

    Lifestyle

    News

    Recent News

    Gay Kid Excited To Be Made Fun Of For Second ThingRestaurant's Extreme Burger Challenge Moved Down To Regular MenuMan Eating McChicken Sandwich Can Tell McDonald's Switched Up AntibioticsKate Middleton Suffering From Morning SicknessObama Fed Grapes While Urging Press Conference To Enjoy OrgyWoman Who Cracked 3 Separate iPhone Screens Expecting Baby Boy This AugustLocal Mosque Only Rated 1.5 Stars On Yelp

    Recent Videos

    Study: Anxiety Resolved By Thinking About It Real Hard

    Web Series Reaches 100 ViewsTim Allen, Mark Wahlberg, And Tara Reid Spotted At Starbucks Discussing Oh God What Are They Planning?

    • TV: Newswire: Turns out The Simpsons' Springfield is in Florida--and part of Universal Orlando

    • TV: Newswire: A&E cancels Intervention, sending it hurtling down a drug-riddled path to destruction

    • TV: TV Club: Does Someone Have To Go?

    • How to Traumatize Your Children Book

    • Assorted Headlines Pint Glasses

    • Cheat to Win Bracelet

    • Web Series Reaches 100 Views

    • Could Plastic Surgery Be Your Ticket To Employment? - Dr. Good - Ep. 2

    • The Best Of Today Now!: Fresh Roasted Cup Of News

    Follow The Onion

    Receive The Newsletter

    • Onion News Empire
    • The Onion Live!
    • Personals
    • FAQ
    • Contact Us
    • Jobs
    • Media Kit
    • Privacy Policy
    • Franchising
    • RSS & Apps

    The Onion is not intended for readers under 18 years of age. ©Copyright 2013 Onion Inc. All rights reserved