Is Ellen Gay?

All of America is talking about comedian Ellen DeGeneres, whose television character on ABC's Ellen may reveal herself to be a lesbian this season. What do you think?

  • “Ellen DeGeneres? More like Ellen Degenerate, if you ask me!”

    Alison Landsman –
    Bank Manager

  • “I've suspected her character was gay ever since that episode where she ferociously ate out that secretary.”

    Don Steffens –
    Limnologist

  • “Thanks to Ellen and Melissa Etheridge, a valuable lesson has been learned: Gay people can be just as mediocre and untalented as straights.”

    Kevin Byrne –
    Receptionist

  • “I think that whatever anyone does behind closed doors is his or her own business, unless the kangaroo's bleating keeps the neighbors up at night.”

    Acker Bilk –
    Systems Analyst

  • “Everybody here at the ABC women's rugby team knows Ellen quite well, and I can assure you there's no truth to those rumors.”

    Kelly Howe –
    Groundskeeper

  • “Forget Ellen—have you heard the rumor that that guy on Martin is a colored?”

    Andy LaPointe –
    Stockbroker