The Dow recently passed 9,000 for the first time in nearly a year, raising hopes that the economy is finally poised for a turnaround. What do you think?

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  It's turning around? Hang on, I want to mention this to the guy repossessing my couch.

  Lou Alessandro
  Truck Driver

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  They're just playing up the economy to distract us from the war.

  Mary Bohnert
  Homemaker

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  As a hurdler, I must warn you: Even though the economy has cleared this hurdle, there will likely be more hurdles to hurdle soon.

  Kathie Coombes
  Hurdler

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  Ah, the economy! How my soul stirs at the thought of discussing it! Sit! Sit! 'Tis a beautiful day, and we have all afternoon!

  Karl Edmonds
  Systems Analyst

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  Do we have enough for another war yet? How about an Olympics? Can I get another $300?

  Mark Adams
  Shipping Clerk

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  And with the low interest rates, there's never been a better time to buy a home. Oh, wait–I'm fucking unemployed.

  Mike Ory
  Unemployed