Torrential drizzle

- Follow @TheOnion

Video
Politics
Sports
Business
Science/Tech
Entertainment
Breaking
More

Video
Politics
Sports
Business
Science/Tech
Entertainment
Breaking

JACKSONVILLE, FL—Jeremy Luft bought a 60-dollar lizard.

National News Highlights • Local • ISSUE 49•05 • Feb 1, 2013

0
0
0

PreviousLOS ANGELES—The sunglasses and hat disguise worn ...NextQUINCY, MA—Local parents John and Leah Helman ...

Recent News

Apparently Facebook Friend Under Impression Ron Paul Still Running For Major Federal Office 16-Year-Old Excited To Have Whole Summer To Plan Shooting For Next School Year Fossilized Evidence Reveals Spazosaurus Was Largest Doofus To Ever Roam Earth American Dental Association Recommends Making Your Gums Hurt Really Bad Once A Day New Michael Bay Romantic Comedy To Focus On Love Story Between 2 Explosions Progressive Charter School Doesn’t Have Students Scientists Find Link Between How Pathetic You Are, How Fast You Respond To Emails

Recent Videos

Sesame Street: 'Bert And Ernie Are Not Gay, They Are Depraved Pansexual Perverts'

New Wearable Computer Also Sucks Your Dick Autopsy Of A Scene: Paul Feig Points Out How Many Ghosts Are In This Scene From 'The Heat'

TV: Great Job, Internet!: Tig Notaro wants to shoot her new documentary in your backyard
Film: Contest: Chicago, see Fruitvale Station early and for free
Film: Newswire: James Franco to continue interpreting Faulkner through the prism of Franco with The Sound And The Fury

Bi-Curious George: An Unauthorized Parody
WTF Stamp
Cheat To Win Bracelet

Sesame Street: 'Bert And Ernie Are Not Gay, They Are Depraved Pansexual Perverts
A.V. Undercover: Machester Orchestra Covers Faces' "Ohh La La"
New Wearable Computer Also Sucks Your Dick

Follow The Onion

Receive The Newsletter

DailyWeekly

Personals
FAQ
Contact Us
Jobs
Media Kit
Privacy Policy
Franchising
RSS & Apps

The Onion is not intended for readers under 18 years of age. ©Copyright 2013 Onion Inc. All rights reserved