0In Tuesday's article on self-defense, The Onion incorrectly reported the location of the "kill spot." It is actually 3 inches to the left, and 1 inch below, the right nipple.
More Corrections
We're So Sorry
The Onion apologizes for its failure to meet the oh-so-high editorial standards of a genius such as yourself.
Homegrown Terrorism
The headline of Tuesday's article about homegrown terrorism was not as alarmist as it could have been.
You Were Right
After defending Cindy for years, The Onion finally realized she’s no good. You were right.
