4-6 inches of February
    • Facebook
    • Twitter
    • Follow @TheOnion
Show/Hide Navigation
  • Video
  • Politics
  • Sports
  • Business
  • Science/Tech
  • Entertainment
  • Breaking
  • More
    • Video
    • Politics
    • Sports
    • Business
    • Science/Tech
    • Entertainment
    • Breaking

    Laroy Hoard and Michelle Carter

    Weddings • Lifestyle • ISSUE 49•14 • Apr 4, 2013
    • Facebook20
    • Twitter0
    • Google Plus1

    Laroy Hoard and Michelle Carter were married in the presence of God before going home to screw.

    More Weddings

    Bob Skylar and Elizabeth Honing

    Bob Skylar, 33, married Elizabeth Honing, 28. But why? Can someone please answer that?

    Jason Noggoh

    Jason Noggoh slid headfirst down the slippery slope into dog marriage.

    Jessica Farthing and Mark Harris

    Jessica Farthing and Mark Harris were joined together in marriage Saturday, but split soon afterwards when Farthing realized she had the wrong Mark Harris.

    Recent News

    Edward Snowden’s Life Just Flat-Out Fun And ExcitingAsshole Awarded For Asshole Behavior By Business Community LeadersGrown Adult Walks Right Into Karate StudioWoman Apparently Wants To Smell EdibleFans Of Green Screens, Incredibly Fake-Looking Things Express Love For Modern CinemaBashar Al-Assad Introduces Syrian Bike-Sharing ProgramDick Van Dyke Finally Confesses To Zodiac Killings

    Recent Videos

    Nation Just Wants To Be Safe, Happy, Rich, Comfortable, Entertained At All Times 

    Area Desk Doesn't Mind If People Sit On It Like A Chair Every Once In AwhileEconomists: People Who Paint Selves Silver And Pretend To Be Statues Make Average Of $10 Million Per Year

    • Film: Newswire: Alec Baldwin maybe joining the cast of the new Cameron Crowe movie

    • TV: Newswire: Warren Buffett is "a huge fan" of Breaking Bad, thinks Walter White is "a great businessman"

    • TV: Newswire: Sarah Michelle Gellar would return as Buffy The Vampire Slayer, but don't get your hopes up

    • WTF Desktop NotePad

    • Kitten Thinks of Nothing But Murder Magnet

    • "I'm a Douche" Coffee Mug

    • A.V. Club Pop Pilgrims: We visit the photo-shoot site that's become a monument to Elliott Smith

    • ...And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dead covers The Kinks' "Sunny Afternoon"

    • A Recap Of This Week's Royal Baby Coverage

    Follow The Onion

    Receive The Newsletter

    • Personals
    • FAQ
    • Contact Us
    • Jobs
    • Media Kit
    • Privacy Policy
    • Franchising
    • RSS & Apps

    The Onion is not intended for readers under 18 years of age. ©Copyright 2013 Onion Inc. All rights reserved