Men's Basketball — Akron, Ohio

GDP Rank Among Olympic Nations If He Were Considered Own Country: 155/203

Heartwarming Background Story: Overcame being born without soul

Family: Compared to most Olympian parents, mother Gloria actually seems normal

Bad Habit: Sometimes, after particularly good game, forgets to thank self

Uplifting Olympic Moment: Bringing all the countries of the world together in a shared hatred of him

NEXT: Maya Moore