Luxury Cars Fail Crash Test

Eight of 11 midsize luxury sedans failed to pass the Insurance Institute for Highway Safety’s tough new front-end crash test, with four such automobiles, including the Mercedes C-Class and Lexus ES, scoring the lowest possible rating of poor. What do you think?

• 

  “Yeah, but just think how impressed the EMTs will be.”

  Mika Buchanan –
  Unemployed

• 

  “Tests like this are silly. Did you know you’re a million times more likely to die in a plane crash?”

  Geoffrey Alstadter –
  Seedling Puller

• 

  “Good to know. So what’s the recommended angle at which I should crash my luxury sedan?”

  Christian Hobbs –
  Taproom Attendant