In regard to last week's coverage of the mall shooting that left nine dead, The Onion apologizes for focusing more on all the great sales the mall had going on rather than on all the dead people.
The Onion apologizes for its failure to meet the oh-so-high editorial standards of a genius such as yourself.
The headline of Tuesday's article about homegrown terrorism was not as alarmist as it could have been.
After defending Cindy for years, The Onion finally realized she’s no good. You were right.