New Congressional Policies
Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi has eliminated smoking in the Capitol Building. Here are some other changes the Democrats have enacted on Capitol Hill:
All representatives fitted with uniforms to improve morale, promote discipline
Casual-Abortion Fridays
Congressional spittoon moved to Rep. Howard Coble's (R–NC) office
Installation of huge dry-erase "idea boards"around the Rotunda
Issues not resolved within first 100 hours will no longer exist
Carte blanche switched from oil companies to welfare recipients
Reinstatement of checks and balances
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