As the playoffs begin, Onion Sports offers an analysis of each team's chances to win it all.

NFC

  • Packers: Despite showing great resolve to make the playoffs, the Band-Aids and loose stitching holding the rest of the roster's appendages together can't last forever
  • Saints: Still the feel-good favorite, so given the way the world's been going lately, their plane will probably crash and kill them all pretty soon
  • Seahawks: Have the most potential, by definition
  • Eagles: The feel-good pick if you're a cat person
  • Bears: As a two seed, Chicago is granted the luxury of waiting an extra week to get embarrassed at home
  • Falcons: Have been a surprise all year, so prepare to be surprised again, depending on whether you expect them to win or lose

AFC

  • Jets: Yes, this team is in the playoffs
  • Ravens: Have everything you want in a playoff team, but not enough to keep you from just talking about The Wire for 90 percent of their game
  • Chiefs: A hardworking team that plays to its strengths, K.C. probably won't lose more than one game this postseason
  • Colts: Could come up with a few big wins if they're able to find a random man to put on a blue shirt and run toward the end zone
  • Steelers: Need to have more confidence in their running game, or at least lie and pretend they do
  • Patriots: …Sigh