Our coverage of the president's recent speech at the State Department failed to mention Barack Hussein Obama's full name. The Onion apologizes to any readers who were left in the dark about what our president is.
The Onion apologizes for its failure to meet the oh-so-high editorial standards of a genius such as yourself.
The headline of Tuesday's article about homegrown terrorism was not as alarmist as it could have been.
After defending Cindy for years, The Onion finally realized she’s no good. You were right.