Due to a deadline, The Onion had to make an educated guess on how the runoff election for Rockwell County supervisor ended last night. The guess turned out to be wrong, but the article was in on time.
The Onion apologizes for its failure to meet the oh-so-high editorial standards of a genius such as yourself.
The headline of Tuesday's article about homegrown terrorism was not as alarmist as it could have been.
After defending Cindy for years, The Onion finally realized she’s no good. You were right.