PALO ALTO, CA—Revealing the long-awaited results of a 10-year study conducted by a massive international research team, scientists confirmed Thursday that work on the Human Genome Enunciation Project was finally complete. “I’m pleased to announce our extensive analysis of the genetic code has now shown us the proper way to pronounce the human genome in its entirety; It’s Gatcaatgaggtggacaccagaggcggggacttgtaaataacactgggctgtaggagtgat,” said project head Timothy Yancey of Stanford University said, adding, “Ggggttcacctctaattctaagatggctagataatg.” “Acgtttcagggttgtgcttctagggtaccgggggggggggggggggggggggggatggggggggggggggggggggcagt…” At press time, Yancey was still enunciating the 3-billion-letter sequence, with sources projecting he would be finished by fall 2027.