UNDISCLOSED LOCATION— Decrying various unspecified aspects of the U.S. Shadow Government, an indeterminate number of Shadow Protesters gathered outside the organization's mountain retreat, sealed germ-free vault, or underground bunker, on Monday. "We unfortunately cannot comment on our feelings about the Shadow Government at this time," said an unnamed protester, neither confirming nor denying reports that he or she accused the Shadow Government of violating the U.S. Constitution. After 20 minutes of protest, the group was dispersed by members of the Shadow Secret Service, who used "means at their disposal."
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