Better bring the servant that holds an umbrella over your head
    • Facebook
    • Twitter
    • Follow @TheOnion
Show/Hide Navigation
  • Video
  • Politics
  • Sports
  • Business
  • Science/Tech
  • Entertainment
  • Breaking
  • More
    • Video
    • Politics
    • Sports
    • Business
    • Science/Tech
    • Entertainment
    • Breaking

    State Of The Arts: Our Museums & Theaters

    Slideshow • Entertainment • art • ISSUE 45•40 • Oct 6, 2009
    • Facebook12
    • Twitter0
    • Google Plus0
    • John Glenn Installed In Smithsonian

      WASHINGTON, DC—John Glenn, the first American to orbit the earth and the oldest man ever in space, is being honored by the Smithsonian National Air and Space Museum, which has installed the former U.S. senator as the centerpiece of its upcoming Milestones Of Flight exhibit.
      1 of 10
    • Unconventional Director Sets Shakespeare Play In Time, Place Shakespeare Intended

      MORRISTOWN, NJ—"When most people hear The Merchant of Venice, they think 1960s Las Vegas, but it's time to shake things up," said maverick director Kevin Hiles.
      2 of 10
    • Creationist Museum Acquires 5,000-Year-Old T. Rex Skeleton

      TULSA, OK—In a major coup for the growing field of creation science, the perfectly preserved remains of a 5,000-year-old Tyrannosaurus Rex were delivered Monday to Tulsa's Creationist Museum of Natural History.
      3 of 10
    • Psychiatrists Treating Phantom Of The Opera Viewers For Post-Melodramatic Stress Disorder

      HOLLYWOOD—Psychiatrists in select cities nationwide have reported a surge in Post-Melodramatic Stress Disorder cases following the Dec. 22 release of Andrew Lloyd Webber's The Phantom Of The Opera.
      4 of 10
    • Trip To Native American Museum Turns Into Cigarette-Buying Spree

      WABENO, WI—A visit to a Native American museum deteriorated into a cigarette-buying spree Sunday, when Milwaukee couple Tracie Hagen and Adam Bersold were lured away from the Potawatomi Historical Center by the chance to buy tax-free cigarettes at a nearby smoke shop.
      5 of 10
    • High School Tony Awards Honor Nation's Biggest Drama Club Nerds

      High school theater's brightest stars gathered last night to see who would take home the coveted award for Most Awkward Kiss.
      6 of 10
    • National Museum Of The Middle Class Opens In Schaumburg, IL

      SCHAUMBURG, IL—The museum details the history of these interesting people, from their
      7 of 10
    • Area Man Saddened To Realize Short Jewish Women With An Interest In Theater His Type

      CHICAGO—David Simms couldn't believe he hadn't made the connection sooner after dating a string of nasally ushers and a stocky divorcée he met at a kosher deli.
      8 of 10
    • Second-Graders Wow Audience With School Production Of Equus

      NEWPORT NEWS, VA—Despite its truncated length and shoestring budget, the production stayed true to Peter Shaffer's original psychosexual-nightmare play.
      9 of 10
    • Oh No, Performers Coming Into Audience

      PITTSBURGH—
      10 of 10
    • More Slideshows

      Start Over
      • Greed In America

      • The Week In Review

      • Crime & Crime Fighters

      • The Week In Review

      • Back To School

    Recently in Slideshow See More >

    NEWS

    SPORTS

    ENTERTAINMENT

    LIFESTYLE

    NEWS

    SCIENCE & TECHNOLOGY

    Recent News

    BREAKING: Lovers Lost In FogReport: 79% Of Sincere Thoughts Played Off As JokesKids Tired Of Hearing Boring Stories About How Father A Skilled, Generous LoverApparently Facebook Friend Under Impression Ron Paul Still Running For Major Federal Office16-Year-Old Excited To Have Whole Summer To Plan Shooting For Next School YearFossilized Evidence Reveals Spazosaurus Was Largest Doofus To Ever Roam EarthAmerican Dental Association Recommends Making Your Gums Hurt Really Bad Once A Day

    Recent Videos

    Universe Crueler, More Uncaring Place Than Previously Thought

    Sesame Street: 'Bert And Ernie Are Not Gay, They Are Depraved Pansexual Perverts'New Wearable Computer Also Sucks Your Dick

    • Film: Newswire: Steven Spielberg wants to produce a new Grapes Of Wrath for today's wrathful grapes

    • Music: Great Job, Internet!: Daft Punk getting their own action figures

    • Film: Newswire: The Butler forced to choose a new title due to very silly reason

    • Bi-Curious George: An Unauthorized Parody

    • WTF Stamp

    • Cheat To Win Bracelet

    • Health Questions, Answers and Free Chicken Wings - Dr. Good - Ep. 9

    • A.V. Club Pop Pilgrims: The golf club that hosted Caddyshack's raucous production

    • Sesame Street: 'Bert And Ernie Are Not Gay, They Are Depraved Pansexual Perverts

    Follow The Onion

    Receive The Newsletter

    • Personals
    • FAQ
    • Contact Us
    • Jobs
    • Media Kit
    • Privacy Policy
    • Franchising
    • RSS & Apps

    The Onion is not intended for readers under 18 years of age. ©Copyright 2013 Onion Inc. All rights reserved