The Onion's 2008 In Review: The Economy

The Dow Jones Industrial Average has fallen nearly 6,000 points since reaching its all-time high of more than 14,000 last year. What do you think?

• 

  “I'm sure that'd be even more terrifying if I knew what the points represented.”

  Curtis Langford –
  Systems Analyst

• 

  “C'mon, I've seen this happen a thousand times. The stock market crashes, and then twenty years and a world war later, everything's fine.”

  Cindy Greenlagh –
  Systems Analyst

• 

  “This sounds like a perfect time to hatch my poorly conceived, undercapitalized business venture, so that when it fails I can blame the economy.”

  Ryan Timms –
  Systems Analyst