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    The Week In Pictures

    Slideshow • ISSUE 47•45 • Nov 14, 2011
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    • Celebrity Chef Ted Allen Cooks His Favorite Pretentious Foodie Bullshit Meal

      Jim and Tracy welcome Celebrity Chef Ted Allen on Today Now! to show them how to make the most obnoxious, contrived meals for your dickhead foodie friends. 
      1 of 13
    • Bank Executives On 15th Floor Gambling On Which Occupy Wall Street Protester Will Be Arrested Next

      NEW YORK—Peering down from their 15th-floor boardroom onto the Occupy Wall Street encampment in Lower Manhattan's Zuccotti Park, executives at the financial services firm Wittinger Group reportedly placed bets Monday on which protester would be arre...
      2 of 13
    • Police: Student Had Embarrassingly Bad Plans For School Shooting

      LEAMON, ID—Following their apprehension Thursday of would-be assassin Trent Beyer, law enforcement officials told reporters the 17-year-old student's attempted shooting rampage at East High School was "embarrassingly bad" and "didn't ...
      3 of 13
    • Brendan Fraser To Star In New Pre-Movie Trivia Question

      HOLLYWOOD, CA—According to a statement published in Variety Tuesday, Mummy star Brendan Fraser has signed on to appear in a new trivia question running before Friday’s 4:50 showing of Puss In Boots.
      4 of 13
    • NBA Says They Can Still Salvage A 10-Game Season

      NEW YORK—Though lockout talks between owners and the players union remain stalled, league officials said late Monday they were still optimistic a deal could be reached in time to salvage a 10-game NBA season.
      5 of 13
    • Report: It All Some Kind Of Sick Joke

      PRINCETON, NJ—According to a new report published this week, researchers at Princeton University and the Institute for Advanced Study have definitively concluded that it—all of it—is some kind of sick joke. The comprehensive study, which...
      6 of 13
    • Latest GOP Debate Concludes With Candidates Wrestling Squealing Pig To Ground And Slaughtering It

      7 of 13
    • Sports Media Asks Molestation Victims What This Means For Joe Paterno's Legacy

      STATE COLLEGE, PA—After former Penn State defensive coach Jerry Sandusky was charged Saturday with multiple counts of involuntary deviate sexual intercourse, corruption of minors, indecent assault, and unlawful contact with minors, the national spor...
      8 of 13
    • Latest GOP Debate Concludes With Candidates Wrestling Squealing Pig To Ground And Slaughtering It

      Bank executives place bets on which Occupy Wall Street protester will be arrested next, a churchgoer blanks on why she's lighting a votive candle, and a new report finds that it's all some kind of sick joke. It's the week of November 7th, 2011.
      9 of 13
    • Celebratory Jets Dump Cooler Of Soap And Water On Rex Ryan

      BUFFALO, NY—As the clock expired Sunday in their 27-11 victory over division rival Buffalo, Jets players honored head coach Rex Ryan by dumping a celebratory orange cooler of hot, soapy water over his body and making sure to cover every inch of him ...
      10 of 13
    • Friend's Excuses For Why He Can't Hang Out Getting More Sophisticated Over Time

      TACOMA, WA—Having spent years making excuses to avoid socializing with friends and acquaintances, local man Eric Shulman's explanations for why he can't hang out have grown more and more sophisticated over time, sources confirmed Saturday. Shulman, ...
      11 of 13
    • Eli Manning Throws Big-Boy Touchdown

      FOXBOROUGH, MA—Trailing in the final seconds of last Sunday's game against New England, New York Giants quarterback Eli Manning, 30, stunned the Patriots by throwing a big-boy touchdown to clinch a victory.
      12 of 13
    • Churchgoer Blanks On Why She Is Lighting Votive Candle

      13 of 13
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