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    The Week In Pictures

    Slideshow • News • ISSUE 48•04 • Jan 30, 2012
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    • Scientists: 'Look, One-Third Of The Human Race Has To Die For Civilization To Be Sustainable, So How Do We Want To Do This?'

      WASHINGTON—Saying there's no way around it at this point, a coalition of scientists announced Thursday that one-third of the world population must die to prevent wide-scale depletion of the planet's resources—and that humankind needs to figure...
      1 of 14
    • Abusive Father Can't Wait To See The Art He's Inspiring His Kids To Create

      CODY, WY—Describing the years of psychological torment he has in­flicted upon his two children James, 14, and Amber, 9, local tax attorney Ted Sheehan told reporters Thursday he couldn't wait to see what kind of art his abuse would inspire them ...
      2 of 14
    • Nation Impressed By Feats Of Very Strong Little Boy

      Pint-Sized Muscleman Can Lift Entire Frozen Turkey Over Head

      WILLIAMSON, NY—Seven-year-old elementary school student Michael Sartinsky has once again wowed the nation with the latest impromptu demonstration of his almost superhuman strength, this time lifting an entire frozen turkey clear over his head and ho...
      3 of 14
    • Ron Paul Supporter Likes The Way Paul Tells It Like It Has No Chance Of Being

      RICHMOND, IN—Self-proclaimed strict constitutionalist and freethinker Rick Crawford told reporters Monday he is supporting Ron Paul in the 2012 Republican presidential primaries because of the way the candidate looks people directly in the eye, does...
      4 of 14
    • Prince Fielder Catching On To Fact That Teams Take Free Agents Out To Dinner A Lot

      ORLANDO, FL—After recently visiting the Texas Rangers to discuss the possibility of signing a long-term contract, All-Star first baseman Prince Fielder told reporters Monday he's beginning to notice how many complimentary meals he's getting from int...
      5 of 14
    • North Korea Returns To Normalcy With Synchronized Disco Jump-Rope Gala

      WASHINGTON—In a sign that North Korea is finally returning to normal following the death of Kim Jong-il, the country reportedly held a festive synchronized disco jump-rope gala in Pyongyang's main public square this week.
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    • Biden Pins Up Guitar Lesson Flyers On White House Bulletin Board

      7 of 14
    • Dead Wife And Kids Replaced By Miniature Horses

      Jim and Tracy partner with the "Bridles of Hope" charity to replace the wife Don Groton lost to a drunk driver with a beautiful miniature horse.
      8 of 14
    • Obama Begins State Of The Union By Asking Congress To Imagine Newt Gingrich Standing Before Them

      9 of 14
    • Romneymania Sweeps America

      TAMPA, FL—From coast to coast, town to town, and in nearly every public meeting place and private residence across America, millions have been captivated, inspired, and in some cases moved to tears by presidential candidate Mitt Romney, the former M...
      10 of 14
    • Jerry Sandusky: I’ll Never Forget All The Things Joe Paterno Did For Me

      STATE COLLEGE, PA—As thousands of mourners gathered at Penn State's campus spiritual center Wednesday afternoon to say their farewells to Joe Paterno, former assistant coach Jerry Sandusky took the opportunity to express his "deep, everlasting ...
      11 of 14
    • Nation’s Least-Appealing Puppies To Face Off In Puppy Bowl

      SILVER SPRING, MD—Calling the collection of puppies assembled for Puppy Bowl VIII a tired rehashing of the same old Jack Russells, pit mixes, collies, and labs, fans around the nations agreed this week that the 2012 contest would be one of the most ...
      12 of 14
    • Nation's Ninetysomethings Gear Up For Last Year Of Their Lives

      BOCA RATON, FL—Excited ninetysomethings across the country announced Wednesday they were gearing up to take full advantage of what promises to be the final year of their lives.
      13 of 14
    • Australian Open Canceled As Tennis Balls Fall Off Bottom Of Earth Into The Sky

      MELBOURNE, AUSTRALIA—Organizers of the Australian Open canceled the highly anticipated Grand Slam event Wednesday night after admitting they were unable to prevent tennis balls from falling off the underside of the planet and into the sky.
      14 of 14
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