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    The Week In Pictures

    Slideshow • News • ISSUE 48•33 • Aug 20, 2012
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    • Your Republican Friend To Explain Why Paul Ryan Is Great Choice

      NEW YORK—Sources confirmed that in response to Mitt Romney's announcement of Paul Ryan as his vice presidential running mate, your Republican friend will soon explain to you that while the Wisconsin representative may appear to be a risky pick, he a...
      1 of 10
    • Jennifer Aniston Engaged To Guy Who Frankly Will Never Replace Brad

      LOS ANGELES—After enduring years of failed relationships and heartbreak, actress Jennifer Aniston is now engaged to boyfriend Justin Theroux, a man who is not and will never be a true replacement for Brad, representatives for Aniston and Theroux con...
      2 of 10
    • Obama Starring In New Judd Apatow Comedy To Appeal To Younger Voters

      In an attempt to court the youth vote, Obama will star in the full-length Judd Apatow comedy "Commander In Steve" alongside James Franco and Seth Rogan.
      3 of 10
    • Paul Ryan Wondering If He Should Have Told Romney About This Guy He's Dating

      DES MOINES, IA—After appearing at his first solo campaign event since becoming the presumptive Republican nominee for vice president, Rep.
      4 of 10
    • Man Thanks God He's Not Sexually Attracted To Children

      TAMPA, FL—Saying his life would be much harder and more complex if it were the case, local accountant Jonathon Farlow, 31, took a private moment Wednesday to thank God he isn't sexually attracted to children. "I really lucked out there," F...
      5 of 10
    • After-Work Drinks Enter Third Excruciating Minute

      BROOKLINE, MA—According to sources who felt professionally obligated to attend, minute three of a management-sponsored after-work gathering at Freddy's Bar and Backroom remains tortuous and almost unbearable for the seven employees of ProVantage Sol...
      6 of 10
    • Area Woman's Hair Always Wet

      DENVER—Whether she's off running errands, meeting friends for drinks, or just relaxing in her apartment after work, local woman Amanda Chapman’s hair is always wet, sources reported Wednesday.
      7 of 10
    • 'Huffington Post' Launches Some Sort Of New Thing

      NEW YORK—This week The Huffington Post officially launched some sort of new thing, which company representatives said will provide an exciting, revolutionary new way for users to do something or other. “We are proud to provide users wit...
      8 of 10
    • Popeye's Home Boiglerized

      SWEETHAVEN VILLAGE—According to a report filed with the Sweethaven Police Department, the private residence of sailor man Popeye was violently boiglerized at approximately 4:30 a.m.
      9 of 10
    • Woman Has Bizarre Ability To Share Details About Personal Life With Parents

      PHILADELPHIA—Seated in the kitchen of her tastefully decorated apartment, local woman Jessica Beaumont looks the part of a typical young urbanite navigating life in the 21st century.
      10 of 10
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