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    The Week In Review

    Slideshow • ISSUE 45•39 • Sep 23, 2009
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    • Outrageous Pictionary Drawing To Go Down In Area Family Lore

      IONIA, MI—At the time, no one predicted the dramatic finish that many now expect will be permanently chronicled in the annals of Anderson family lore, perhaps surpassing in its tellings the legendary occasion upon which Grandma Florence did the chicken dance at Cousin Marcia's wedding.
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    • Self-Defense Instructor Simulates Attacker Right Down To Erection

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    • U.S. Government Finds $20 Trillion Buried By Absentminded Reagan In 1987

      WASHINGTON—While senior officials were initially unsure of where the hoard of valuables had come from, a number of clues—most notably a framed photo of former first lady Nancy Reagan accompanied by the note
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    • Derek Jeter Honored For Having Fewer Hits Than Harold Baines

      NEW YORK—Following Derek Jeter's 2,722nd career hit Friday, Yankee fans and teammates took a moment to honor the all-star shortstop for having 144 fewer hits than former journeyman designated hitter Harold Baines.
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    • Free-Range Chicken Makes It To Bolivia

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    • Melting Ice Caps Expose Hundreds Of Secret Arctic Lairs

      ZACKENBERG RESEARCH STATION, GREENLAND—According to oceanographers, the Arctic Circle has been devastated by the effects of global warming in recent years, threatening hundreds of men and women who use the frozen tundra as a place to conduct bizarre experiments in human-animal grafting or carry out massive government cover-ups.
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    • Job Became Completely Humiliating So Gradually Area Man Barely Noticed

      CHICAGO—"Now that I think about it, a lot of little things have sort of slowly added up, like when they reduced my lunch hour to 30 minutes last October," Stephen Durkee said while walking CFO Janice Dugan's poorly behaved English bulldog.
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    • How To Stay Goth Past 50

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