Celebrating 13 years since the release of "Twister"
    • Facebook
    • Twitter
    • Follow @TheOnion
Show/Hide Navigation
  • Video
  • Politics
  • Sports
  • Business
  • Science/Tech
  • Entertainment
  • Breaking
  • More
    • Video
    • Politics
    • Sports
    • Business
    • Science/Tech
    • Entertainment
    • Breaking

    The Week In Review

    Slideshow • ISSUE 45•42 • Oct 13, 2009
    • Facebook24
    • Twitter1
    • Google Plus0
    • Struggling Museum Now Allowing Patrons To Touch Paintings

      NEW YORK—
      1 of 8
    • Japanese Businessman Found Hiding On Golf Course Thinks Mid-'80s Economic Boom Still Going On

      2 of 8
    • Obama: Health Care Plan Would Give Seniors Right To Choose How They Are Killed

      WASHINGTON—"If your grandmother would rather be euthanized in the privacy of her own home than be gutted and hanged on a high school soccer field, she is entitled to that right," said the president, who acknowledged that "wiping out" the nation's elderly population has always been his No. 1 priority.
      3 of 8
    • ESPN Completely Misses Brett Favre Vs. Green Bay Packers Storyline

      BRISTOL, CT—In what is being called the biggest gaffe in the sports network's 30-year history, ESPN totally forgot to cover last week's Brett Favre vs. Green Bay Packers storyline.
      4 of 8
    • God Introduces New Bird

      THE HEAVENS—Available in two colors­—male and female—the bird reportedly combines everything God has learned from His previous works into one
      5 of 8
    • Cheering Crowd Actually Trying To Get Attention Of Guy Behind Iron Maiden

      6 of 8
    • Community Gives Up Following Tragedy

      FORT SCOTT, KS—"Honestly, I don't see the people of Fort Scott looking to one another for solace during this trying time, or really looking to one another for anything ever again," said mayor Thomas Dietrich.
      7 of 8
    • Our Own Patrick Kehoe Writes Another Signature Patrick Kehoe Article That Can't Be Described In Just 8 or 10 Words

      8 of 8
    • More Slideshows

      Start Over
      • State Of The Arts: Our Museums & Theaters

      • Greed In America

      • The Week In Review

      • Crime & Crime Fighters

      • The Week In Review

    Recently in Slideshow See More >

    LIFESTYLE

    LIFESTYLE

    NEWS

    SPORTS

    ENTERTAINMENT

    ENTERTAINMENT

    Recent News

    Ahmadinejad Signs On As Dean At Sarah LawrenceNation Admits It Always A Little Bored By Whole Jimmy Hoffa ThingSyrian Rebels, Government Think It’s About Time To Call Syria A DayItaly, Japan Advance To G8 FinalsFinancial Sector Thinks It’s About Ready To Ruin World AgainSources: You Don’t Want To Know What Currently Happening To Saudi Arabian Woman‘Whitey Bulger Ordered The Murder Of 19 People,’ Reports Anonymous Rat Bastard

    Recent Videos

    Will Season Four Of ‘Downton Abbey’ Finally Show The Wizards Using Their Powers?

    The Onion Looks Back At 'The Wizard Of Oz'Single Woman Has Facebook Profile Picture With Sister

    • So You Think You Can Dance, "Meet The Top 20"

    • Pretty Little Liars, "Turn Off The Shoe"

    • TV: Inventory: Meddling Kids + Sidekick + Mysteries = Series: 13 Hanna-Barbera productions that recycled the Scooby-Doo format

    • I Kissed a Republican Chewing Gum

    • Area Man T-Shirt

    • I Hate Whatever Today Is Mug

    • Will Season Four Of 'Downton Abbey' Finally Show The Wizards Using Their Powers?

    • A.V. Undercover: Alpine Covers Radiohead

    • A.V. Club Stand Down: Tig Notaro bombs onstage, then things get worse

    Follow The Onion

    Receive The Newsletter

    • Personals
    • FAQ
    • Contact Us
    • Jobs
    • Media Kit
    • Privacy Policy
    • Franchising
    • RSS & Apps

    The Onion is not intended for readers under 18 years of age. ©Copyright 2013 Onion Inc. All rights reserved