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    The Week In Review

    Slideshow • ISSUE 46•14 • Apr 12, 2010
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    • Pope Vows To Get Church Pedophilia Down To Acceptable Levels

      VATICAN CITY—Calling the behavior shameful, sinful, and much more frequent than the Vatican was comfortable with, Pope Benedict XVI vowed this week to bring the widespread pedophilia within the Roman Catholic Church down to a more manageable level.
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    • Area Plant Proudly Displays Leaf

      2 of 9
    • Man Attempts To Assassinate Obama, 'But Not Because He's Black Or Anything'

      Suspect Alex Croft, who has a ton of black friends, planned to kill Obama because of his socialist agenda—not because of his skin color.
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    • U.S. Government: We Have Not Forgotten About Osaka Binn Rogen

      WASHINGTON—High-ranking intelligence officials said Monday that the military was still aggressively pursuing notorious terrorist Osaka Binn Rogen, declaring that they had not forgotten about bringing the leader of the Al Hydra network to justice.
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    • Tiger Woods Followed Everywhere At Masters By Sex Addiction Sponsor

      AUGUSTA, GA—Sources close to Tiger Woods confirmed Friday that, due to the large number of women expected to attend this year's Masters...
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    • Republicans, Leukemia Team Up To Repeal Health Care Law

      WASHINGTON—In the coming weeks, Republicans and leukemia will travel the country in an effort to diminish support for the increasingly popular bill, which GOP sources said goes against everything that Republicans and the massive accumulation of toxic cells stand for.
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    • Goliath Joins Duke Basketball Team In Victory Celebration

      7 of 9
    • DEA Official Announces Successful Drug Bust On Son's Room

      DEA Official Stephen Lovejoy says Matt Lovejoy was found in possession of 1/8th ounce of marijuana and a glass pipe in defiance of the law and his Mother.
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    • Why LeBron James Will Stay In The NBA

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