Totally new type of sunlight today
    • Facebook
    • Twitter
    • Follow @TheOnion
Show/Hide Navigation
  • Video
  • Politics
  • Sports
  • Business
  • Science/Tech
  • Entertainment
  • Breaking
  • More
    • Video
    • Politics
    • Sports
    • Business
    • Science/Tech
    • Entertainment
    • Breaking

    The Week In Review

    Slideshow • ISSUE 46•21 • Jun 1, 2010
    • Facebook30
    • Twitter4
    • Google Plus0
    • National Parks Closed For Annual Remajestification

      WASHINGTON—According to officials, the weeklong process includes extensive brook re-babbling, the application of new bark to some 37,000 giant redwood trees, litter removal, and the sharpening and re-snowcapping of every peak in the Rockies.
      1 of 10
    • Tony Blair Apparently Not British Prime Minister Anymore

      2 of 10
    • Christian Groups: Biblical Armageddon Must Be Taught Alongside Global Warming

      Constitutional debate continues over whether public schools should include biblical Armageddon alongside global warming in end-of-world curriculum.
      3 of 10
    • White House Jester Beheaded For Making Fun Of Soaring National Debt

      WASHINGTON—"For crimes of great arrogance and cheek, His Idiocy the White House Jester has been sentenced to a swift demise," said White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs. "Let it be heard over every city and suburb of this land that the National Debt is no topic for frivolity, and the mailed hand of Obama shall smite all offenders."
      4 of 10
    • Existentialist Firefighter Delays 3 Deaths

      SCHAUMBURG, IL—In an ultimately futile act some have described as courageous and others have called a mere postponing of the inevitable, existentialist firefighter James Farber delayed three deaths Monday, entering a burning home and prolonging its residents’ inevitable march toward oblivion.
      5 of 10
    • Congressmen Submit Emergency 3 AM Bill Demanding IHOP Stay Open All Night

      The bipartisan group of representatives who submitted the emergency bill late last night say they stand by it, though they don't completely remember all of the details.
      6 of 10
    • Abused Child Running Out Of Black Crayon

      7 of 10
    • President Obama Mentions He'd Like To See LeBron James In Chicago, Also That He's Leader Of The Free World

      WASHINGTON—President of the United States, basketball fan, and former Chicago resident Barack Obama once again weighed in on the future of LeBron James Wednesday, saying how much he would enjoy seeing the superstar play for the Bulls, and also that ...
      8 of 10
    • Work Friend Accidentally Becomes Real Friend

      ATLANTA—"It's like everything had shifted," Eric Phipps said. "All of a sudden, I was stopping by his cubicle to ask about his woodworking project, and he was at mine giving me the name of a good chiropractor my sister should try for her back spasms. Then somehow I suddenly had his personal e-mail address."
      9 of 10
    • Wishing Our Readers A Kick-Ass Three-Day Weekend

      10 of 10
    • More Slideshows

      Start Over
      • Social Conventions

      • Energy

      • Women

      • Environment

      • The Week In Review

    Recently in Slideshow See More >

    WORKPLACE

    LIFESTYLE

    NEWS

    SPORTS

    ENTERTAINMENT

    NEWS

    Recent News

    Edward Snowden’s Life Just Flat-Out Fun And ExcitingAsshole Awarded For Asshole Behavior By Business Community LeadersGrown Adult Walks Right Into Karate StudioWoman Apparently Wants To Smell EdibleFans Of Green Screens, Incredibly Fake-Looking Things Express Love For Modern CinemaBashar Al-Assad Introduces Syrian Bike-Sharing ProgramDick Van Dyke Finally Confesses To Zodiac Killings

    Recent Videos

    Nation Just Wants To Be Safe, Happy, Rich, Comfortable, Entertained At All Times 

    Area Desk Doesn't Mind If People Sit On It Like A Chair Every Once In AwhileEconomists: People Who Paint Selves Silver And Pretend To Be Statues Make Average Of $10 Million Per Year

    • NTSF: SD: SUV::, "Hawaii Die-0"

    • Film: AVQ&A: What upcoming 2013 entertainment are you most anticipating?

    • TV: Random Roles: Allison Jones on casting Arrested Development guests, freaks, geeks, a virgin, and hard-rockin' zombies

    • WTF Desktop NotePad

    • Kitten Thinks of Nothing But Murder Magnet

    • "I'm a Douche" Coffee Mug

    • Nation Just Wants To Be Safe, Happy, Rich, Comfortable, Entertained At All Times

    • A.V. Club Pop Pilgrims: We visit the photo-shoot site that's become a monument to Elliott Smith

    • A.V. Undercover: ...And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dead covers The Kinks' "Sunny Afternoon"

    Follow The Onion

    Receive The Newsletter

    • Personals
    • FAQ
    • Contact Us
    • Jobs
    • Media Kit
    • Privacy Policy
    • Franchising
    • RSS & Apps

    The Onion is not intended for readers under 18 years of age. ©Copyright 2013 Onion Inc. All rights reserved