Due to a printing error, last week's comics page did not include the final panel of The Wizard Of Id. The parrot was supposed to say, "That makes two of us!" The Onion apologizes for the omission.
An article yesterday repeatedly referred to Hillary Clinton as “the birthday girl.” This was unprofessional and entirely inaccurate.
The Onion apologizes for its failure to meet the oh-so-high editorial standards of a genius such as yourself.
The headline of Tuesday's article about homegrown terrorism was not as alarmist as it could have been.