This week's 5 best-selling books as compiled by The Onion Book Review:

  1. Kurt Vonnegut: The Shopping ListsKurt Vonnegut (HarperCollins, $21.95)Devotees of the late writer will love this latest collection of shopping lists he took with him to the grocery store in case he forgot something.
  2. I Bet The Publishing Company $1,000,000 They Wouldn’t Publish ThisMartin Van Hulken (Penguin, $19.99)And now the author really regrets doing that.
  3. Fur Burger: The Sexy Side of Sesame StreetFrank Oz (Simon & Schuster, $24.99)Muppet veteran Oz sheds light on the behind-the-scenes sexual underworld of the Children’s Television Workshop.
  4. Hey, Get Off Of There! Ben Falser (Random House, $23.99)A list of stuff you shouldn’t be standing on.
  5. The Quran(Avery, $20.50)The audiobook version of the Islamic holy book continues to sell briskly. Narrated by Gilbert Gottfried.