This week's 5 best-selling books as compiled by The Onion Book Review:

  1. Who Did The Thing They Shouldn’t Have Done?James Patterson (Simon & Schuster, $21.99)Detective Francis Diepold is out to solve the case of a crime that shouldn’t have been committed but was anyway.
  2. Pictures Of People Eating KimchiJason Park (Little, Brown, $28.99)An elegant coffee table book of people from around the world grimacing after ingesting the Korean delicacy.
  3. The Surf TunnelerKhaled Hosseini, (Riverhead, $26.95)The author of The Kite Runner and Mud Gliders continues his trend of writing thrilling, third-world sports novels.
  4. The Stretched-Out T-Shirt CollarCleed Wickson, (Bantam $18.00)After one big tug, Frank Haill just ruined his shirt and perhaps his marriage, too.
  5. How To Fold A Flag: 21st RevisionLeonard Slattery (Pierson, $12.99)The editors of the How To Fold A Flag series unveil a groundbreaking new variation on the popular Percival method.