CorrectionsOpinion ISSUE 48•11 Mar 14, 2012

Early this morning one of our deliverymen managed to run over not one but two dogs along Beacon Street. The Onion sends its heartfelt apologies to the families of Koda and Beans.

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Cucumber Mixup

In Monday’s issue, we misspelled “cucumber” as “konkowbar.” We regret the error.

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Our Pleasure

A recent correction claimed that The Onion regretted an error when, in fact, it took secret pleasure in the error.