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Sports News in Brief

Young Knicks Player Keeps Asking About Patrick Ewing

April 12, 2007 | ISSUE 43•15

NEW YORK—Sources within the New York Knicks organization report that outspoken Knicks guard Nate Robinson continues to ask pressing questions concerning the whereabouts of "the supposed big-time legend" Patrick Ewing during team practices, in-game timeouts, and even personal phone calls to Knicks coach Isiah Thomas. "If this guy's so good, if he's such a Knicks institution, how come he never shows up to practice, or even regular-season games, like the rest of us do?" Robinson asked during lay-up drills the day after a crushing defeat by the Detroit Pistons. "I mean, we really could have used a seven-foot-tall, 11-time All-Star against Shaq last week, am I right? Couldn't have hurt, could it?" Robinson's obsession may have reached a crisis point earlier this week when, after noticing Ewing's jersey hanging from the ceiling at Madison Square Garden, Robinson took possession of it and chased a seven-foot-tall man around New York City, eventually realizing he had apprehended a vacationing Dikembe Mutombo.

The Onion

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