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The Onion's Comprehensive Guide To Thanksgiving

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With the growing popularity of “fast fashion,” or designs that move quickly from the runway to retail chains, many wonder how their favorite styles first arise. The Onion breaks down the process step by step

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SpaceX founder Elon Musk continues to lay the groundwork to attempt the human colonization of Mars. Here’s a step-by-step guide to his plan:

Bill Clinton Resting Up To Sit Upright At Next Debate

CHAPPAQUA, NY—Stating that the former commander-in-chief had his sights squarely set on next Sunday, spokespeople for the Hillary for America campaign informed reporters Wednesday that Bill Clinton is currently resting up in preparation for another evening of sitting upright at the next presidential debate.

Cyclist Clearly Loves Signaling Turns

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Fact-Checking The First Presidential Debate

Addressing issues ranging from national security to trade to their personal controversies, Democratic nominee Hillary Clinton and Republican nominee Donald Trump squared off in the first presidential debate Monday. The Onion takes a look at the validity of their bolder claims:
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The Onion's Comprehensive Guide To Thanksgiving

The Onion's Guide To Hosting A Perfect Thanksgiving

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Only College Student Staying On Campus Planning Saddest Thanksgiving Meal Of All Time

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Reporter Investigates Claims He Ruined His Family's Thanksgiving Dinner

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Mom Brought To Tears By Thing Picked Up At Airport

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Top Thanksgiving Turkey Substitutes

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Why Are We Hosting Thanksgiving?

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Thanksgiving Football Highlights

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Americans Enjoying Thanksgiving Tradition Of Sitting Around At Airport

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Obama Outlines Moral, Philosophical Justifications For Turkey Pardon

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20,000 Sacrificed In Annual Blood Offering To Corporate America

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FDA Approves Seconds

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Grandma Concerned About Dinner Roll Count

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26-Year-Old To See Every Asshole He Ever Went To High School With On Night Before Thanksgiving

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Making Family Gatherings Stress-Free

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Unstable Relative, Toddler Compete For Attention At Family Get-Together

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Study Finds Link Between Red Wine, Letting Mother Know What You Really Think

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95 Percent Of Opinions Withheld On Visit To Family

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Nation's Uncles Enter Last Stage Of Prep For Thursday's Thanksgiving Debates

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Who Are We Inviting To Thanksgiving?

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Cowboys' Presumed Thanksgiving Win To Cause Nation To Vomit Up Dinners

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New Balloons In This Year's Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade

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Domino's Introduces Thanksgiving Feast Pizza

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In Thanksgiving Tradition, Bush Pardons Scooter Libby In Giant Turkey Costume

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BREAKING: Cousin Mark Coming After All

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Dez Bryant Smacks Son During Thanksgiving Game Promo

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Turkey Pardon Mishap Results In Accidental Release Of Serial Rapist

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Siblings Gather Around PowerPoint To Hash Out Off-Limits Topics For Thanksgiving

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Thousands Gather For Stuffing Of Giant Rockefeller Center Turkey

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White House Thanksgiving Turkey Detained Without Counsel

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Black Friday Deals

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How To Cook A Perfect Thanksgiving Turkey

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The Clemency Of Cranberry

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Winter Storm Threatens Homeless Man’s Plans To Survive Over Thanksgiving

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Thanksgiving By The Numbers

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FAA Issues Holiday Reminder That Planes Can Crash And Kill You

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What's Our Family's Thanksgiving Tradition?

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Unclear Whether Grandpa Having Good Time

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The Onion’s Tips For Traveling Over The Holidays

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Pope Francis Canonizes Single Turkey In Annual Vatican Tradition

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Infertile Aunt Doing It Up Big At Kids Table

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