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National Zoo Announces Giant Pandas To Divorce

WASHINGTON—Assuring the public that the decision was difficult but the right thing to do for all parties involved, the Smithsonian National Zoological Park announced Friday that their giant pandas would be divorcing.

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

Pros And Cons Of Electric Cars

With technology improving and more automobile companies releasing electric models, electric cars are becoming a common alternative for American consumers. Here are the pros and cons of electric vehicles.
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The Week In Pictures – Week Of August 21, 2017

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Laptop Gets To Age When It Can Be Lightly Tossed Sometimes

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Parents Sit Down With Child For ‘Sex, Lies, And Videotape’ Talk

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Charlottesville Suspect Might Have Received Tacit Support From High-Level Government Figure

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Nervous Steve Bannon Binge-Eats Entire Class Of Interns Amid Calls For Removal

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Man Waiting To See How Few More Decades Of Racial Violence Play Out Before Taking Action

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Target ‘Dorm Room Essentials’ Aisle Being Browsed Exclusively By 30-Year-Old Men With Studio Apartments

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Cleveland Browns Players Amazed By Star Rookie Comfortable Walking Around Shirtless

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Complex Human Being Reduced To ‘Gutter Guy’ For Purposes Of To-Do List

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Study: Other Countries Weird

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Condo Board Member Thinks Bylaw Cover-Up Might Go All The Way To Deb

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No One Quite Sure Why 8-Year-Old Has Voice Of Lifelong Chain Smoker

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President’s American Manufacturing Council Down To CEO Of Shoe Carnival

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Disgusted Robert Mueller Eats 2 20-Piece Chicken McNugget Meals In One Sitting In Attempt To Get Into Trump’s Mind

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Ruth Bader Ginsburg Returns To Off-Season Lifeguarding Job

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Trump: ‘There Is Hatred On Both Sides Of My Heart’

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Trump Warns Removing Confederate Statues Could Be Slippery Slope To Eliminating Racism Entirely

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Trump Blasts Critics Who Judge Neo-Nazi Groups By Most Extreme Members

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Man Who Stood And Watched Robbery Acted On Pure Instinct

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Local Grandmother Feared Dead After Appearing In Woman’s Profile Picture

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Baltimore Pigeons Shocked To Find Beloved Shitting Statues Gone

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Area Man Will Be Judge Of Whether Woman Actually True Baseball Fan

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Panicked John Kelly Ushers Half-Naked Trump Away From Podium As President Shouts Support For Eugenics

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Larry Fitzgerald Confident He Has Couple Lousy Seasons That Undercut Entire Career Left In Him

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Cat Who Seems A Little Grumpy Today Dying Of Esophageal Cancer

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Parent Now Just Typing 4-Year-Old Child’s Every Word Verbatim Throughout Day As Facebook Post

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Study Finds Expressing Anger In Unhealthy Ways Actually Incredibly Satisfying

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Girlfriend Surprises Rob Gronkowski With Relaxing Couple’s CAT Scan

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Nation Rallies Around Ronald McDonald Statue That Embodies Country’s True Heritage

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Malala Can Tell Oxford Paired Her With Roommate Just Because They’re Both Nobel Laureates

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Trump Inspires Thousands Of Kids To Believe They Could One Day Grow Up To Be President Of Confederacy

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Aides Say Bannon Was Not On The Record When He Issued Deafening, Atonal Howl That Caused Journalist’s Skull To Explode

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Inverted Bob Added To Supercuts Arctic Vault Where Hairstyles Preserved For Future Generations

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Man Worried Favorite Jedi Died After Seeing ‘Obi-Wan Kenobi’ Trending

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Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

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Nation Begs Disaffected Youth Gravitating Toward Neo-Nazism To Get High And Play Xbox Instead

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‘My Work Here Is Done,’ Smiles Contented Bannon Before Bursting Into Millions Of Spores

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Spanish Authorities Ask Anyone With Information About Curbing Endless Cycle Of Nihilistic Violence To Come Forward

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Report: 97% Of Inner Tube Occupants Agree It Doesn’t Get Any Better Than This

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Man Forced To Pathetically Comb Through Movie For Familiar Scene After Falling Asleep Previous Night

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European Leaders: ‘We Stand Together To Say Loud And Clear: We Are Scared As Fuck And Don’t Know What To Do’

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SeaWorld Dynamites Orca That Beached Itself On Concrete Walkway

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Report: There Just Something Dark And Intriguing About Man With Serious Personality Disorder

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NASCAR Adds Gravel Warning Track To Alert Drivers Of Wall

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Francis Ford Coppola Admits Wedding Scene In ‘The Godfather’ Needed More Lasagna

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More from this section

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

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