Patrick Duffy To Take Some Quality Patrick Duffy Time

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Vol 45 Issue 12

Oh No, Performers Coming Into Audience

PITTSBURGH—"Their smiles are so big," a female theatergoer said while pretending to look for something in her purse. "Why does that one have a cordless microphone? Is he going to try to talk to us?"
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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  • The Onion’s Guide To Beach Etiquette

    The arrival of summer means that the nation’s beaches will soon be crowded with swimmers, tanners, surfers, and more, so it’s important for everyone to be conscious of each other’s space and needs. Here are some etiquette tips to ensure that everyone has a safe and relaxing time at the beach:

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