NAPERVILLE, IL—Displaying levels of human concentration usually reserved for deciphering military codes or performing cardiac surgery, airplane passenger Amber Reyson, 37, spent several minutes Sunday studying an Us Weekly photo spread devote...
WINNEMUCCA, NV—Eight-year-old Ella Neumark said Saturday that in recent weeks she has become increasingly aware of how her adorable physical characteristics make her superior to unattractive girls. Ella told reporters she has only lately begun to ap...
President Obama releases a new tell-all book about America, a cute eight-year-old is beginning to realize how much better she is than ugly girls, and a new Facebook feature allows users to cancel their account.
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox
8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC
Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!
TOPEKA, KS—Expressing dismay at his shockingly coldblooded behavior, sources confirmed that local man and heartless monster Ethan McKenzie, 34, walked out of local small business Hearthstone Artisan Goods on Tuesday without purchasing anything.
UNION CITY, NJ—Recommending that he give himself the chance to pause and explore the other options out there, friends of local man Jonathan Gember expressed their concerns to reporters Wednesday that the 29-year-old is already committing to a new television show just hours after getting out of a seven-season-long series.