adBlockCheck

I’m Always Open To Feedback That I Can Get Defensive About And Ultimately Ignore

Top Headlines

Recent News

Cannon Overshoots Tim Kaine Across Wells Fargo Center

PHILADELPHIA—Noting that the vice presidential nominee had been launched nearly 100 feet into the air during his entrance into the Democratic National Convention Wednesday night, sources reported that the cannon at the back of the Wells Fargo Center had accidentally overshot Tim Kaine across the arena, sending him crashing to the stage several dozen feet beyond the erected safety net.

Wow, Dad Really Went From Zero To 60 With Woodworking This Summer

PAGE, AZ—Expressing their astonishment as they once again heard the sound of their father using his circular saw in the garage despite his seemingly complete lack of interest in the craft prior to last month, the children of area man Sam Morgan, 52, confirmed Tuesday that, wow, their dad had really gone from zero to 60 with woodworking this summer.

Who Is Tim Kaine?

Virginia senator Tim Kaine will be Hillary Clinton’s running mate on the Democratic Party ticket in the 2016 presidential election. Here’s what you need to know about Kaine

Lone Superdelegate Voting For Martin O’Malley Feels Like Total Fucking Idiot

PHILADELPHIA—Sheepishly raising his hand to nominate the man who suspended his presidential campaign back in February, unpledged delegate Bob Shiefke told reporters Tuesday he felt like a “total fucking idiot” for being the only person at the Democratic National Convention voting for former Maryland governor Martin O’Malley.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

I’m Always Open To Feedback That I Can Get Defensive About And Ultimately Ignore

I’ll be the first to admit I’m not perfect. I make mistakes, the same as any of us do. We’re only human, after all, and despite our best intentions, we’re bound to make poor choices now and then. What distinguishes us as individuals is how we act when we discover we’ve made a mistake. For me, the answer is simple: It’s all about keeping myself open to feedback that I can get incredibly defensive about and ultimately disregard.

That’s all there is to it! Whether it comes from my employer or spouse, a close relative or dear friend, I welcome constructive criticism, invariably become really, really touchy about it, and then never take anyone’s suggestions to heart.

I’m not the kind of person who just closes himself off to the viewpoints of others. I consider my willingness to listen to another person’s concerns while refusing to accept even the smallest portion of the blame one of my greatest strengths. I’m comfortable enough with myself to hear people out for at least a few seconds before I interrupt, grow increasingly combative, decide I don’t want to hear a word they have to say, and then storm out in a huff before they’ve even finished talking.

That’s just the motto I live by: Reflexively ignore honest critiques and focus intense hatred toward whoever offered them to you.

It’s how I operate at home, at work, at church, and everywhere else. It doesn’t matter if I’m conversing with neighbors, talking to a group of concerned friends and family members, or playing in my Thursday night softball league—communication is vital in every part of life. I want people to feel they can come to me and say what’s on their minds, so I can convince myself their argument is groundless and then contradict them vociferously while failing to give their ideas even a moment of my consideration.

For example, the other day, my coworker Allie brought up how I could be a bit better about finishing my projects on time. As soon as the first critical word left her mouth, I began angrily attempting to justify my lateness in a way that insinuated the fault really lay with her. I subsequently dismissed her observation as biased and self-serving and, most importantly, neglected to alter my work habits in any way.

Feedback received!

Sometimes I opt for a subtler approach, like the time my wife Katherine asked if I wouldn’t mind helping out more around the house and I simply ignored her remark. Perhaps she thought I hadn’t heard her, because I never acknowledged the comment until a week had passed and she left some unwashed dishes in the sink, giving me the opportunity to throw her words right back in her face and deride her as a hypocrite. It’s as simple as that.

Try me: If you notice an area in which I could stand to improve and feel like having absolutely zero impact on my behavior, just let me know. I’m all ears when it comes to taking criticism, stewing about it, and then somehow deflecting it back as quickly and snidely as possible while letting my festering resentment take the place of any actual change.

What’s more, I may vilify you as a person and discount your opinion simply because you had the gall to express it. I may hold a grudge for weeks or even months. I may ask, what the fuck do you know about anything, anyway?

It’s this attitude that’s gotten me where I am today.

So feel free to pop in anytime you’d like to incite my rage and bitterness. I’ll be happy to disregard any thoughts you may have.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close