Next Week's School Shooting Victims Thank Senate For Failing To Pass Gun Bill
WASHINGTON—Following the Senate’s rejection of a bipartisan amendment to expand background checks for gun buyers, the young victims of next week’s school ...
Congress
Budget Super Committee A Bust
Tasked with finding $1.2 trillion worth of deficit cuts to be spread over the next 10 years, the budget super committee in Congress announced ...
Troubled Democrats To Undergo Party Counseling
Democrats finally admitted they may need help to work out their issues.
New Congressional Power Rankings Oversight Committee Marks Federalization Of Power Rankings
WASHINGTON—The U.S. Congress today announced the formation of the National Power Rankings and Team-Positioning Joint Oversight Committee...
Congress Announces Plan To Hide Nation's Porn From Future Generations
Congress hopes the Pornographic Media Concealment Act will ensure a lasting, respectable legacy for our nation, unmarred by the massive quantities of filthy porn we ...
Massa Insinuates He Was Forced Out
After resigning amidst allegations of sexual harassment, former Rep. Eric Massa (D-NY) told Larry King and Glenn Beck that he was targeted by the...
Alternate Health Care Bills
In response to President Obama's call for compromise, several lawmakers have concocted their own health care reform bills. Here are some...
Lawmaker Seeks To Ban U.S. Currency
Mike Pitts, a representative in the South Carolina legislature, has proposed a law that would replace dollars with gold and silver in his state. What...
Senator Misses Simpler Time When He Could Do Abominable Things In Peace
WASHINGTON—After being targeted by a Senate Ethics Committee probe for engaging in alleged improprieties with a former staffer, Sen. John...
Reid Under Fire For Racially Charged Comments
In a new book about the 2008 presidential campaign, Harry Reid is quoted as saying that Obama could be elected because he was "light-skinned" and ...
Dodd Steps Down
In the wake of his failed bid for president and sliding poll numbers, Sen. Christopher Dodd (D-CT) announced Wednesday that he would not seek...
Senator Byrd The Longest-Serving Lawmaker
After more than 56 years in office, 92-year-old Sen. Robert C. Byrd (D-WV) has become the longest-serving member of Congress. What do you...
H.R. 2651 Fans Storm Senate Floor After Passage Of Bill
WASHINGTON—Diehard fans of H.R. 2651 charged the floor of the Senate chamber Tuesday after their bill, a 14-vote underdog nicknamed the...
Congress Approves $500 Billion For Monument To Human Folly
WASHINGTON—"Our goal is to create a structure that, like the human race itself, is doomed from the outset and plagued by innate flaws that ...
Senate Passes Blame By Vote Of 91-8
WASHINGTON—In a rare display of bipartisanship, senators on both sides of the aisle set aside their differences Tuesday and passed off...
Cat Congress Mired In Sunbeam
WASHINGTON—"We've come up against an unforeseen circumstance, but we'll resume deliberation and voting as quickly as is reasonably possible," said majority leader ...
