Finance
WTO May Accept Russia
If negotiations go smoothly, Russia may be invited to join the World Trade Organization in 2006. What do you think?
'He's A Stockbroker,' Says Woman Who Finds That Exciting
NEW YORK—During a 12:30 luncheon with friends at Niko Niko Tuesday, Pamela Gordon, 27, described her recent date with 30-year-old stockbroker Ken Rosen ...
Ten Years Of Life Dedicated To Getting Municipal Pool Not Built
MANKATO, MN—The Mankato City Council voted 6-3 against the issuance of a $500,000 municipal bond Tuesday, marking the end of one man's ...
Consumption Tax Proposed
Last week, Federal Reserve Chairman Alan Greenspan said a consumption tax, such as a national sales tax, could benefit the nation's economy. What do ...
Dollar Low Against Euro
Last week, the U.S dollar dipped to a record low against the euro. What are the reasons for the currency's decline?
Stock Analysts Confused, Frightened By Boar Market
NEW YORK—Stock analysts on Wall Street fled in terror after being spooked by the rare but deadly boar market that reared its head at ...
World Bank Forecloses On World Farm
WASHINGTON, DC—Following years of threats, the World Bank foreclosed on the World Farm, a 64,000-square-mile plot of arable land in Dodoma, Tanzania that ...
Secretary Of Defense Humiliated As U.S. Credit Card Rejected
ST. LOUIS—An attempt to build international goodwill backfired horribly for Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld Monday, when he was unable to pick up the tab ...
The Interest-Rate Hike
Last week, the Federal Reserve raised a key short-term interest rate for the first time in four years. What do you think?
Dollar Losing Value Against The Quarter
NEW YORK—After falling 6 percent in the past three weeks, the U.S. dollar hit a 208-year low against the U.S. quarter, which ...
22-Year-Old Fuck Complains Of Age Discrimination
SAN MIGUEL, CA—Passed over for a promotion at Barton Financial Services, little 22-year-old fuck Darren Meeker filed a lawsuit against the company Monday, claiming ...
Midwesterners Descend On Insurance Company's Free Nail Files
CHICAGO–At the Chicago Home Expo Monday, throngs of voracious Midwesterners descended on the State Farm Insurance booth to grab free promotional nail files. "Look ...
Chapter 11 For Boston Archdiocese?
Already reeling from sex-abuse charges, the Boston Archdiocese is now considering filing for bankruptcy. What do you think?
CEO Would Trade 5 Percent Of Stock Options For 10 Percent More Time With His Kids
HARTFORD, CT—Feeling sentimental Tuesday, Allied Plastics CEO Jonathan Mavre said he would gladly sacrifice a significant portion of his liquid assets for increased quality ...
Purchase Justified By Theoretical $50 Rebate
LAKESIDE, VA—The theoretical possibility of receiving a $50 mail-in rebate motivated shopper Jim Crewes, 28, to purchase a color printer Monday. "I really can ...
