Middle east
Middle East Small Talks To Focus On Getting Israel, Palestine To Discuss Weather
LONDON—According to State Department officials, the violently clashing peoples of Israel and Palestine have agreed to resume small talks...
Supreme Court Overturns Bush v. Gore
WASHINGTON—"Al Gore has prevailed—I hope he can see this nation through a catastrophic recession and an unending war in Iraq," said George W ...
Long-Standing Conflict Ends As Israel Returns Lawn Mower To Palestine
JERUSALEM—"Sure it belches smoke and has no grass-clipping bag but that's not the point—if you borrow something you return it," said diplomat ...
Israel, Palestine Now Fighting Over Cemetery Space
JERUSALEM—"Israel has always been the deathplace of the Jews," said Moshe Abrahim. "To have it occupied by Palestinian bodies is an insult to our ...
U.S. Intelligence: Iran Possesses Trillions Of Potentially Dangerous Atoms
WASHINGTON—"Iran maintains the atoms will only be used to form the building blocks of all existence, but we cannot afford to take that risk ...
U.S. To Re-Hang Saddam Hussein
WASHINGTON, DC—The re-hanging, which will be aired on all major networks, will be "brighter, cheerier, and more upbeat" than the first anticlimactic attempt.
Iran, U.S. Hold Bilateral Talks
The United States and Iran held their first formal talks in 27 years in order to discuss the security of Iraq. What do you think?
Middle East Conflict Intensifies As Blah Blah Blah, Etc. Etc.
MIDDLE EAST—The U.N. has issued a strongly worded thingy denouncing someone or something having to do with the vicious suicide whatevers that tore ...
Khalid Sheikh Mohammed Confesses To Confessing Under Torture
GUANTANAMO BAY, CUBA—Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, the alleged 9/11 mastermind who recently admitted to murdering journalist Daniel Pearl and...
Israeli President Accused Of Rape
The Israeli parliament agreed to allow President Moshe Katsav to temporarily step down in order to fight possible rape charges. What do you...
Israel Bombs Anti-Semitism Out Of Lebanon
Hezbollah declared that the mass bombing of their homeland gave them new respect for Israel as "a legitimate power and a beacon of democracy."
Iraq War Recommendations
The Baker Study Group recently released their report on new Iraq strategies. Here are the some of America's options for Iraq currently on the...
New Anti-Terrorism Strategy
The White House recently released an updated version of its anti-terrorism strategy, "National Strategy For Combating Terrorism." Here are its...
War-Torn Middle East Seeks Solace In Religion
JERUSALEM—Millions of Middle Easterners are turning to one thing to make sense of the seemingly endless violence between Israelis and Arabs: religion.
Prohibitively High Rocket-Fuel Prices Bring Mideast Crisis To Standstill
BEIRUT, LEBANON—Lines at the pump extended for miles as frustrated Hezbollah soldiers waited for hours to fill up their Katushyas and Qassam-2s.
Death Penalty For Hussein?
Chief prosecutor Jaafar al-Moussawi called for the death penalty for Saddam Hussein for crimes against humanity during attacks on Shiite civilians in...















